Warning: If you are easily offended by swearing, potentially offensive viewpoints or Chelsea Handler, please do not read any further as I don't care enough to deal with your responses to my tirades.
Well, newsflash, I truly only care about the pursuit of happiness.
Life can suck it. You're not all you're cracked up to be. American dream my ass. I think the only thing on the other side of that rainbow is a pot of shit and an IOU declaring my student loan totals.
Liberty, well given that I really have no idea how to exercise liberty in America other than to vote every other year and to feel free to swear in public, liberty can suck it too. She hasn't proven to be that useful and God forbid I exercise my rights to proclaim faith in a world where Christianity is the only unacceptable religion.
The pursuit of happiness. I don't know where this road leads; I don't know where it begins, but I sure do want to find it. Happiness is such a relative term. I was "happy" twenty minutes ago while eating cake with my co-workers, but am I "happy" now being back at my desk waiting for the next mundane email to flow in? Um, no.
Do I believe happiness can be a state of mind? Sure, if you shit rainbows and spend the day proclaiming that you're "running the race", but let's be realistic here, happiness is not a constant. Even if I spent everyday trying to be happy, at some point: a bird will shit on me, a child will start screaming at the table next to me during my dinner out with my wife, some asshole will decide that they just have to cut in front me on the way home from work, and I will spend another day doing the same damn thing I've done for the past three years.
Where I think the road may begin:
I find happiness when I'm in a pool with a margarita.
I find happiness when I am at a Broadway show.
I find happiness when I am walking the dogs with my wife (only on a temperate day though).
I find happiness eating pizza, chocolate ice cream, and mozzarella sticks.
I find happiness when no one is calling me.
The pursuit of happiness - still in pursuit - but at least I know it involves a margarita.
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